Nobody wants to face the stressful and emotional challenges associated with a divorce. Yet, when a marriage ends, for any reason, it’s something that has to be handled, no matter how difficult it may be. The good news is that there are plenty of things that you can do to make sure that the process is as easy on everyone involved as it can be. It doesn’t have to end in heated disagreements and fights. While you can only do your part, and you can’t control what anyone else does, doing your part to the best of your ability could go a long way towards ensuring that you end the marriage as civilly as you can and that nobody is terribly traumatized or financially ruined by the event. Beyond this, by doing what you can to make the process easier, you can also save time and money and maintain positive relationships.
The Importance of Putting Your Children First
If there are children involved, then this can make the divorce far more complicated, with more emotionally charged disagreements. It can also result in trauma for those children and damaged parental relationships. Before you do anything or say anything, consider the impact on the children of the marriage. There may be challenges with custody disputes and it may be extremely difficult to resolve those challenges. Fortunately, there are ways to improve this situation. For example, when you work with an attorney, your lawyer can help you to deal with the difficult decisions, and arrange mediation for you and your spouse to try to reach mutually acceptable agreements and arrangements.
If possible, you can resolve this on your own, by simply discussing the situation and the best interests of the children with your spouse and reaching an agreement together. This is not always a reasonable solution, especially when arguments and disagreements have already been expressed and when either party is unwilling to budge on their position. All too often, parents will use their children against each other. Avoid this at all costs, though you cannot control how the other parent behaves.
If your children are suffering from the event of divorce, as they most likely will in one way or another, you may benefit from family counseling or counseling for the children. This can help everyone involved to process their feelings and restore a sense of security after the upset of divorce.
You Need to Be Clear About What is Most Important to You
Divorce comes with many issues, whether there are children involved or not. You will have to deal with the division of marital assets, property, retirement accounts, savings and checking accounts, and more. Depending on the situation, you might be concerned about the need for alimony (spousal support), or figuring out who should get the house or the car.
If you are clear about what is most important to you, then this gives you a very good place to start when it comes to making these decisions and coming to agreements. You should also know what’s most important to your spouse. You may be able to come to agreements more easily with an understanding of each other’s priorities. For a basic example, you may be more concerned about keeping the house, and your spouse may be more concerned about keeping a car. Disagreements about property are common, as are disagreements about children, and even pets.
You should be prepared to make some concessions, because it is difficult in a divorce for everyone to get everything that they want. Do your best to be open minded and think from a fair perspective. It may help to try to see the situation from the outside, without the complications of your own emotions and differences. Most people going through divorce are hurting or even angry, but if you were to remove these issues, would you see other party’s requests and priorities as being more reasonable or understandable? This can be very challenging, but it can make the divorce easier on everyone.
It Is Usually Better to Resolve Your Divorce Issues Outside of Court
If at all possible, you’ll want to settle your differences and various issues without the intervention of a judge. Going to court can make an already difficult situation that much more contentious and upsetting for everyone involved. Go into it with the goal of settling your issues without the need to take them to a judge. Your attorney and mediation can be of great help in avoiding this expensive, time consuming, and often upsetting situation. When you resolve your issues without going to court, you are likely to feel better about the solutions that you come to and more in control of the outcome.
Contact an Experienced South Carolina Divorce Attorney
One of the best things that you can do for yourself and your family is to seek the advice of an experienced South Carolina divorce attorney. This way, you have the information you need from a legal perspective, and a better understanding of what to expect. If your spouse is unwilling to budge on issues of importance, then you can avoid getting run over by having a lawyer on your side. If you and your spouse can come to agreements on the concerns that each of you have, an attorney can facilitate this. Contact Lauren Taylor Law to schedule a free consultation.